Sometimes when we get to the end of our day and take inventory of what we did that brought us pleasure and made our hearts feel alive, we come up short.

If this happens with regularity, it might be that our life balance scale has tipped too far toward responsibility and people-pleasing. We run through our day from one thing to the next to make sure we are in control and on top of things. It’s so easy to put those things we need on the back burner, telling ourselves we’ll get to it when there’s more time.

Can you relate?

Women know how to get results. We know how to pack the most into our schedules, and we know how to multi-task in order to do it all. Because that’s what the modern woman does.

But do we know how to make our heart feel alive?

You’ll know the answer to this question by looking at your calendar to see what fills the dates and checkboxes each week.

• Medical appointments
• Pet grooming
• Meetings
• School schedules
• Sports practices and games
• Mani-pedi’s
• Bill due dates
• Grocery shopping

Sometimes it seems there aren’t enough days in a month to fit our commitments. By the time we’ve made our lists and juggled our schedule every which way, who has time to squeeze in anything nonessential? Often, any available open slots immediately become overflow or an opportunity to fit in one more task.

Who has time to be frivolous enough to actually schedule anything that really makes us feel alive?

Life is too busy for that.

I have too much to do. 

It won’t get done if I don’t do it.

There are just not enough hours in a day.

Something has to go by the wayside.

I’ll find time later.

And before we know it, later never comes.

If you’re reading this, and many of these statements resonate, you’re not alone. As women, we constantly find ourselves in the space of balancing, juggling, and spinning plates. We do it because we’re good at it. It’s one of our many superpowers!

But the hidden truth in all of this balancing, juggling, and spinning of plates is that it doesn’t equate to healthy self-love.

Prioritizing aliveness is essential to healthy self-love.

Healthy self-love is simply committing to accept ourselves completely with kindness, respect, and compassion while also taking responsibility for our own growth and nurturing of our well-being. This includes nurturing our well-being with what our heart loves.

A good place to start is by knowing.

In coaching women, I meet many who don’t know what makes them feel aliveness. They’ve not regularly connected with their own aliveness. It’s hard for them to remember the last time they felt energy rush through their body. Living a busy, over-committed life on autopilot is often the societal norm. But it comes with a heavy price as it strips away the aliveness our soul craves. It relegates us to live from the neck up, unknowingly devaluing what is essential in its very essence.

The best way to start is by exploring and rediscovering.

Exploring is the best part of the journey. Rediscovery is a chance to reconnect with yourself and love yourself more deeply.

Last week you were invited to explore what you want with great abandon. This week, the invitation is to explore what makes your heart feel alive with childlike delight.

If you’re ready to explore and reconnect with yourself, the 40 Things I Love is a great resource to get you started. I encourage you to set aside some time to relax, grab markers or colored pencils and enjoy.