Finding Forever Through the "I Do"

Sometimes forever seems like yesterday.

It’s been 30 years since he gave me the first piece of the puzzle that would change our entire life. One white cardboard piece followed by 6 additional. And with each assembled piece on that cold and snowy Valentine’s evening, the anticipation and gravity of what these 7 perfect pieces represented came together.

The bands of a ring delicately drawn with the diamond as the last inserted piece. As I completed the puzzle, his most important question flew nervously from his lips. He took my breath away that night.

He was asking me to agree to forever. To forever with him.

In that moment of “yes” and “I do”, we were incapable of understanding what forever really meant. Two imperfect, unknowingly broken people trying to create the perfect life together.

There were many times when a long-term view was not a part of our vocabulary or our mindset. It was enough just to get through the daily struggles and challenges every marriage experiences.

We’ve made our share of mistakes.

We’ve been selfish and stubborn.

We’ve been rude and hot-tempered and silent.

We’ve spit out words we wish we’d never uttered.

But in 30 years, the one thing we’ve done best is fight…for us and for an extraordinary legacy – over and over and over. Because we knew if we didn’t fight, it would be too easy to walk away. If we didn’t fight, we’d be robbing ourselves and our children of all God said yes to at the moment we said, “I do.”

Finding and fighting for our forever “I Do” means also choosing to fight for our children’s forever “I Do.”

We’ve fought for the little things. Instead of sweeping these under the nearest rug, we did our best to keep them small. Too many “I do’s” have been severed when the seed of bitterness takes root in the small things. We’ve learned to honor each other and this union by choosing to enter into the small things.

We’ve fought for unity. Sometimes it took minutes, hours or days. But unity has always been the goal. And when unity couldn’t’ be reached on our own, we sought out those willing to come alongside, to give clarity, guidance and support. Now, when unity calls for humility, our ears are more tuned to listening and our pride more open to surrendering.

Because we know that this earthly forever “I Do” is a splendid glimpse of the sacred and the eternal forever.

Finding forever through the I DO is a glimpse of the sacred and eternal forever. Share on X

We’ve fought for healing of our broken places. Even when the road to healing meant trudging through the thickest, darkest muck – we refused to retreat. The promise of something beautiful and refined is always worth the fight. Rarely has it come quick enough for our human heart, but always just in time for the yielding and mending to bring us one step closer to forever.

We’ve fought for holy above happy. Because holy carries us into happy. It stretches and shapes and reconciles us to one another and to God. This fighting and chasing after holy has been fiercely difficult for each of us. But ultimately, it has changed us more than any hope of us changing each other. It’s softened our hearts to truth and refined our character. It’s woven mercy through our expectations and redefined perfect…forever.

We’ve fought for new beginnings. Every new beginning is a fresh yes, overflowing with forgiveness, grace and unconditional love. One more glimpse of the sacred and the eternal. An opportunity to reflect the heart of the One who ordained our first beginning. We no longer fear the end because each destination is always a new beginning.

And although the ring has been upgraded to a much more visible representation of our “I Do”, the little nibblet of a diamond on the last puzzle piece is a perfect reminder.

That finding forever begins with fighting for just one more today.

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