“Better a small serving of vegetables with love than a fattened calf with hatred.” Proverbs 15:17 (NIV)

Eleven years together called for a celebration. So we tried. We really did.

And in an effort to recreate the magic of our wedding night, we dined on lobster and steak and booked a room for the night. This time instead of the Rocky Mountains, we overlooked the Atlantic.

From the outside our lives sparkled like the earrings Tim gave me that night. But on the inside our hearts had become hardened toward one another. Because while we still loved each other, we loved ourselves more. It was either his way or my way, never our way.

Without a God intervention, we were on course for divorce.

Our words were few that night. I determined it was better to chew my food than the aftermath of regretted words.

Rain prevented a moonlight walk on the beach. But the storm outside paled in comparison to the storm inside. And things got worse, much worse before they got better.

Choosing to stay together was a start. But learning to keep God at the center, both of our lives and our marriage, was the key. We couldn’t do this my way or Tim’s way. We needed to do it God’s way.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 tells us, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Our marriage needed God at the center.

God at the center of our hearts. God at the center of our decisions. God at the center of our lives.

More than ten years have passed since that night. Ten more anniversaries celebrated. From grand feasts to home-cooked meals, love really does make the difference. Loving God with all my heart, soul, strength and mind and then loving my husband as myself (Luke 10:27).

If you are in the middle of those difficult times, friend, I want to offer you hope. Things can and will get better if you look to God and keep holding on to Him.

As I prayed to God and sought Him to change me first and then my marriage, I saw glimmers of hope. And it didn’t take long before Tim joined in on those efforts. Eventually God healed what was broken and one became two became three.

Building a marriage with God at the center meant we needed to let go of the hurts and allow God to fill in our broken places.

In order for God to transform our marriage, we did three key things:

♥Slash the word “divorce” from our vocabulary. If we wanted our marriage to work, we needed to know we were both committed to making it last. And that meant leaving the past in the past.

♥See “US” as being on the same team. Fighting together is much better than fighting one another. And knowing we’re in it together helps us face the challenges that come our way.

♥Seek God daily. Every morning I’m on my knees praying both for my husband and our marriage. I recognize I can’t do this on my own but through Christ alone.

We really are stronger with God at the center.

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Crystal Storms is a writer and heart encourager who loves Jesus and seeks to glorify God in all she does. Married to her best friend for over 21 years, Tim and Crystal live in Florida with their sweet dog Minnie. You can connect with Crystal at CrystalStorms.me where you’ll find encouragement for your heart as we seek God’s heart.

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Marriage Matters Series Continues…

You’re invited each Tuesday in September for the Marriage Matters Series! Come prepared to be encouraged and strengthened as my friends Lori Schumaker, Crystal Storms and Denise Hughes share some great wisdom and insight to help us get through the unhappy times, focus on the positives, breathe life in our marriage and find lasting joy in a long-term view!

♥If you missed last week’s heartwarming story by Lori Schumaker, you can catch it here!

Join @ DeniseJHughes on 9/20 as she shares how to Breathe Life Into Our Marriage #marriagematters Share on X

And it get’s even better – Denise J. Hughes will be giving away 2 copies of her new Word Writers study on Ephesians, just in time for the online study which begins October 24th, and Ruth Schwenk will be giving away a copy of her new book, For Better or for Kids to 1 lucky reader.

♥CONGRATULATIONS to Clare at My Life in Step! She’s won the beautiful “Love Never Fails” Print!