Almost 20 years ago, when my brother and sister-in-law told me they decided to name their daughter Sarah, I wasn’t happy. Fighting back the tears, my voice cracked as I tried to answer their bewilderment. My heart went into a panic and disrupted the explanation that tried to exit my mouth.
I was far from clear. How could anyone understand that I had been hurt—dreadfully hurt—by girls named Sarah all growing up?
The Seed of Rejection
It started when I was about four years old. I skipped up to the popular girl’s house a few doors down. No wonder it was quiet in the neighborhood; all the kids were over at Sarah’s house. I wanted to join them. Even at that young age, I felt the pull of wanting to be accepted.
I slowly approached the little kids standing in her driveway. They were making fun of the little girl who lived next door to me, Sarah being the ringleader of the gathered. I tried to defend my neighbor, saddened by the way they were treating her.
Next, I was Sarah’s new victim, and she turned her evil glint on my younger, shaking self. Sarah started giving commands. She had two or three friends surround the first girl and then had a couple of kids come and take my hands, one on each side. I was too young to know that I could have pulled away and run free, and even more naïve to allow what happened next.
She continued in her commands: they were to pull my pants down. Then the rest down. They obeyed like spineless ants honor-bound. After the shock wore off the little girls and boys present, I became a laughingstock. An adult appeared sixty seconds too late, the damage already done to my tender heart. I ran home crying to my mom, but the tears continued many, many years later.
After that, I held at arm’s length any female I encountered that happened to be named Sarah. The raging hurt of years past marked my skepticism, and I subconsciously lashed out in rejection by any unsuspecting “Sarah” only to create more episodes of damage to my battered heart.
Therefore, when my brother and sister-in-law told me I needed to accept their decision to name my unborn niece Sarah, it was not the joyous occasion it should have been.
Daniel Faced Rejection
Daniel in the Bible was no stranger to rejection. A captive to Babylon and a death sentence to the fiery furnace, miraculously delivered, by that time a part of his history, he now faced a den of lions.
They rejected his God, his values, and his right to live. They tricked him and then threw him in a pit with lions.
Daniel didn’t harbor bitterness against his conspirators, and the lions were forbidden by God to devour him because he was found guiltless (Daniel 6:22).
May I suggest a spiritual analogy from this story? The hurt of rejection feels like someone threw you into a pit, doesn’t it?
The book of first Peter warns that the devil is our adversary, like a lion seeking to devour us. Our Enemy would love that chance. Doesn’t he try to trick us into letting him? (Think Adam and Eve.)
God is with us in the pit, and we can face it with brave trust in His promise that He will never forsake us. Share on X
Healing from the Pain of Rejection
I became a professional harbourer of hurt, living in misery before I asked God to heal my heart. He’s taken me on a long journey to discover how to be healed from the heart-shattering pain of rejection.
I’ve tested his promise and found it faithful:
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalms 147:3 (ESV)
I know now if I hold unforgiveness, I also keep the hurt. But if I follow God‘s design of forgiveness in responding to rejection, then I close the door for the “lion“ to devour me by trickery.
We’ll have our pits of rejection, but we don’t have to live with the hurt. I’m living proof.
And I’m looking to make a new friend, especially if her name is Sarah.
We are made to live authentic and brave! Sharing our stories of braving rejection in the #MadeforBrave #Sisterhood Share on XKelly R. Baker is a Bible study teacher, writer, and mentor. She serves with her husband in leading the worship ministry at their church. You will probably find her sneaking a bite (or more) of organic dark chocolate in between wrangling her four kids.
Her greatest passion is helping women thrive in Christ. Connect with her at www.kellyrbaker.com.
Sisters, we are called to walk the way of hope instead of the way of defeat. We must claim more than our title of “Daughter of the King.” We must step up and also claim our position.
And we must claim these together. As a sisterhood; a sisterhood of brave women who stand strong in the promises of who God is and who we are.
- We all are Made for Brave.
- We are made to live for something authentic and brave.
- And in living brave, we silence the past, transform the future, and take a front row seat to God’s wild and uncontainable love!
So, I’m inviting you to join this Made for Brave Sisterhood, each Monday as we share our stories and allow God to bring hope and healing. Let’s commit to being authentic and brave, one step at a time, side by side, holding each other up and nudging each other toward our true selves. And let’s claim the victory waiting on the other side of brave; for ourselves and our sisterhood.
Let’s celebrate our tears and our struggles as we peel away the layers of fear to reveal the beauty of brave.
Let’s risk everything that brave requires for everything that brave has to offer…
Becoming who we were created to be!
Join the Made for Brave Sisterhood Every Monday - Sharing our stories of becoming who we were created to be! #MadeforBrave #Sisterhood Share on XDo you have a Made for Brave story to share? Get the writing guidelines and submit your stories HERE!
